How to lose 5 pounds in 5 days.

1) Cut intake of delicious rum containing drinks, with names like Jamaican Delight and Dirty Banana, (from seven to twelve a day) to zero.

2) Stop eating that extra meal between breakfast #1 and lunch (I call this meal "breakfast #2).

3) Stop having that afternoon snack of jerk chicken or fillet mignon. Just because it's there does not mean you have to eat it.

I think I will call my diet the "Jamaican-free diet". I am certain that this revolutionary new diet will increase traffic to my blog. Prospective dieters: I guarantee that if you just gained 7 pounds at an all inclusive Caribbean resort, you can lose 5 pounds with my new diet. You could end up spending thousands of dollars on exercise equipment and diet pills...how about a donation to the boat fund?